Lucy receives a letter in the post, which makes her angry – she failed her primary exams. Megan throws her pills down the toilet and Julie jokes with Jimmy that his dancing isn’t up to scratch.
An old poacher, Alfred Newcombe, is out with his grandson, Eric, showing him his old haunts, when he collapses. Eric drives him to A&E, where Lucy diagnoses terminal cancer called carconomotosis. Eric tries to get him and his father, Graham, to make peace, Graham says he loved him once. Later Alfred dies peacefully, with Eric by his side.
A monk, Father Dominic, is brought in after hanging himself, fearing God doesn’t love him. Charlie and Megan discover he has also tortured himself with a studded belt, which has gone sceptic. Megan tries to help him regain his faith.
Lucy talks about Leonardo de Vinci to a housewife, Angie Peters, who dressed as an angel, has given herself a hernia from doing ballet dancing.
Cyril gets a 78 year old man, Mr Roberts, to admit he caught his VD from a Meals and Wheels lady, Alex has a man throw up on her – not the bowl, and Charlie treats Gerald Vaughan, who had a man throw a glass at his face in a pub because he thought he was Irish.
Andrew has left Duffy, who in turn is very moody – she takes it out on Alex saying she never should’ve become a nurse, and after a bump on the head, Charlie tries to keep the department chirpy with his impersonations.
* Alfred Newcombe – old man dies with terminal cancer, carconomotosis.
* Father Dominic – hangs himself and has sceptic wound after wearing a studded belt.
* Gerald Vaughan – cut face after having glass thrown at him.
* Mr Roberts – 78 year old man with VD.
* Angie Peters – 36 year old housewife with a hernia from dancing.
* Tramp lady
* Alex treat a man who is sick over her.
Alfred : How many A Levels are you gonna work for, eh? (they see a rabbit, he gets his dog to chase it) Go go go go on Hero! Go on Eric after him! That’s it boy.
Eric : Go on Hero!
Alfred : Yeah boy yeah yeah go go on!
Eric : He got it Gramps, he got it!
Alfred : That’s the boy, good boy Eric!
Eric : Thank you very much Mr Fairhead
Charlie : … Horse doctor, and brain surgery, bedlam, my specialty (shake hands, Eric walks out and meets dog and they walk out of A&E, as an ambulance pulls up)
* Lucy’s locker number is A16.
* Charlie’s impression was of WC Fields.